Couples Therapy in South Pasadena
You can care deeply about each other and still find yourselves having the same arguments, pulling away, or struggling to feel close. Stress, anxiety, or major changes can intensify familiar tensions and leave both partners feeling misunderstood or distant from one another.
Over time, small disagreements can begin to carry more weight. A conversation about chores, time, intimacy, or responsibilities can quickly become tied to feelings of rejection, disappointment, or not being supported.
In couples therapy, I help partners slow down these interactions, identify the pattern between them, and communicate feelings and needs that can be harder to express in the moment.
Common Reasons Couples Seek Therapy
You may be dealing with:
Recurring arguments or unresolved conflict
Feeling unheard or misunderstood
Emotional distance or disconnection
Difficulty communicating needs
Differences around responsibilities or expectations
Changes in intimacy or physical connection
Rebuilding trust after hurt or betrayal
Stress related to work, family, or other circumstances
Pregnancy and the transition to parenthood
Major life transitions
Often the issue that brings a couple into therapy is not the entire story. Disagreements about chores, communication, intimacy, or responsibilities can carry deeper feelings of being alone, unimportant, rejected, or overwhelmed.
Understanding the Relationship Cycle
One partner may become more anxious and seek reassurance while the other becomes overwhelmed and withdraws. The more one pursues, the more the other pulls away, creating a cycle that can leave both partners frustrated and disconnected.
As couples begin to recognize this cycle, there can be more room for curiosity and choice. We can better understand what each person is experiencing and practice different ways of communicating.
Building a Different Way of Connecting
My couples work is trauma-informed and draws from mindfulness and attachment-focused approaches. I aim to create a space where both partners can feel heard while also taking responsibility for their own part in the relationship.
We might focus on:
Interrupting recurring cycles
Communicating needs clearly and directly
Listening with less defensiveness
Expressing vulnerable emotions more openly
Rebuilding trust and emotional safety
Strengthening emotional and physical intimacy
Negotiating responsibilities and expectations
Adapting to major transitions together
We can also pay attention to what happens internally during difficult interactions. Learning to notice when emotions are escalating, pause when needed, and communicate from a more regulated place can change the course of a conversation.
Couples in Transition
Career changes, moving, grief, family stress, pregnancy, or becoming parents can place new demands on a relationship. Couples often need to renegotiate responsibilities, intimacy, expectations, and how they support one another.
These periods can bring existing differences to the surface or create challenges neither partner anticipated. We can explore what has shifted, talk more openly about what each of you needs, and find ways to move through this period as a couple.
How Past Experiences Shape the Relationship
Every relationship has its own patterns of communication and conflict. Some emerge early, while others become more established or harder to change over time.
We can look at how these dynamics developed, what each partner brings from their own history and experiences, and what continues to reinforce them in the present. Greater awareness can create more flexibility in how you communicate and relate, making it easier to stay connected even when you disagree.
I work with couples of all identities and relationship structures and provide LGBTQIA+ affirming care. I offer couples therapy in South Pasadena for clients from nearby communities including Pasadena, Highland Park, and Eagle Rock.
Frequently Asked Questions
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The first session gives me a chance to hear from both partners about what brings you in, what has been difficult, and what you each hope might change. We will begin identifying the dynamics that develop between you and clarifying what you would like to work toward together.
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Recurring arguments often develop into a cycle in which each partner’s reaction affects the other. Looking at that cycle can help you recognize what is happening beneath the surface of the conflict and begin finding different ways to communicate and respond to one another.
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It is common for partners to begin therapy with different levels of comfort, hope, or uncertainty about the process. We can make space for those differences rather than expecting both of you to arrive with the same perspective or goals.
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No. Couples come to therapy for many reasons, including feeling disconnected, communication difficulties, changes in intimacy, parenting stress, major transitions, or wanting to strengthen the relationship before problems become more entrenched.
Ready to Connect?
In-person therapy in South Pasadena and online therapy throughout California.
I offer a free 15-minute phone consultation to hear a little about what you’re looking for, answer any questions you have, and see if we might be a good fit.
Please fill out your contact information and I’ll be in touch shortly. If you’d like to move forward after the consultation, we can find a time for your first session.